Happy Lazer

named after a famous heroine

a chocolate bun sent her to heaven

her name was Happy Lazer

she was as impressive as Faker

with pretty monster designs

making fantasy feel real

her archnemesis 

was a highly attractive male

a fan of dungeons

since the age of negative 4

fascinated with illnesses

and obscure jpop idols

her favourite foods are overnight oats

and happy foods without sugar

she wouldn't know these words

if she were any younger

she makes the most intricate coffee

from a place not on the map

because everyone is ugly and beautiful

and very easy to kill

it gives her a sense of completion

to entertain people 

with song covers and giant robots

making her a very unlikely idol

what goes up must come down

is what guitars say to her

that's why she's good 

at making those bendy bendy sounds

creating

wild characters, wild habits, wild health plans

because people need people

and she needs the weird ones